When I first came to an AA meeting, I heard people share their stories and had quite mixed feelings about it all. My head was clouded, I wasn't in any condition to fully take much in as I was withdrawing from the effects of alcohol addiction. Experiencing extreme levels of anxiety, lack of sleep, bad dreams etc, I ended up with my butt firmly planted on a chair just listening to people drone on about their drinking history.
I remember 2 things that was distinctly stated which stuck in my head 1) keep coming back and 2) look for the similarities not the differences. There were alot of drunkalogs with people seemingly competing for the best, or rather worst drinking stories! Personally, some of the stuff I just couldnt relate to like drinking bottles of metho etc which made me question if I should really be there! After a few meetings someone drummed it in to my brain to listen to the similarities and hang on to those!
Later on a woman with 10 years up, who later became my first sponsor told me that I suffered from eternal uniqueness! Apparently most alcoholics suffer from this condition and we really are just a garden variety alcoholic! So now I look back on that and wonder if that was the very start of dealing with my questioning things in AA?!
I think what kept me coming back was the need for a sense of belonging! I knew I could no longer drink, or hang out with people who did, so I had no stuffing elsewhere to go or nothing else to do at the time! So yeah, I stuck around and identified with the similarities and even had a number of laughs! The comradery in the beginning was kind of special, especially when I was coaxed into doing 90 meetings in 90 days!
Then all of that changed almost within a few months of getting a sponsor! And I was constantly told I suffered from eternal uniqueness and the only cure was the 12 steps! I had way too many questions!