I've been thinking about becoming a substance abuse counselor. I figure the client would come into my office, I'd let him talk for a bit, and then I'd say "if drugs and alcohol cause you so much grief, just don't use anymore. Next patient please!" If the patient had other issues, I'd just refer him out and collect my fee. It would be easy, and every patient who followed my recommendation would have a 100% success rate, guaranteed. I certainly could not do any worse than the average two hatter 12 Step therapist, right?