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I don't know how many times I can say that it is being pressured to do "the only thing that works", and keep trying again, again, again, again. Geeze, looking back it would have been nice to hear, "If AA isn't for you and you are going to try something different I wish you the best of luck, you can do it!". Clara, the way I experienced it (and many others, as it turns out), is if you say you have a substance problem then you are sent (pointed, pushed, pulled) down a ONE WAY STREET. It's deceiving.

I went to a doctor for my substance problem. I'd of been much better off had he said, "Sorry, I have nothing to offer. Good luck!", rather than only tell me about AA/NA and push that endlessly.

The beef I have is NOT that I don't have 5 things to choose from, it's that the one thing I was I was pressured into happened to be a self serving religion that didn't take any responsibility themselves.

I definitely have a responsibility, we all do of course. One of the first things you are taught is that you need to ask for help. Which is what we did. The problem is that we were lied to, and repeatedly by many. The assholes that repeatedly lie to have a responsibility too. When they tell you to trust them and they break that trust, it's perfectly fair to let the world know about it. I feel that I have the right, and a responsibility to do just that.

This is the same thing as going to a doctor for a broken leg and finding out that the only treatment offered and performed had only a 5% chance of fixing your leg. Yet they claimed it was the ONLY WAY and had a 50 – 75% chance. Then after years of that treatment for your leg you find out that the doc and the founder of the treatment (and everyone else that used that method for broken legs) were lying. There were other ways to fix broken bones, including resting at home without treatment. They just didn’t want you to know about it.

Clara, you're not fully responsible for how your investment unless you are somehow that huge of an influence on the housing market and its crash. I don't think you either need to fully take responsibility for every single misfortune or blame others for it. How much research can people be expected to do when they're desperate and their thinking is clouded by the substances? Hindsight is always 20/20, as we all know, and while I cannot answer for Avo, and I did as much research as I thought I could when I needed help, it was mostly conflicting. And confusing. There are a lot of very loud voices out there who will tell you that this is the only way.

I wish I could've either had massive amounts of help at the time or have fixed it all myself initially, which is what I did in the end anyway. I thought that surely someone would help me out of this fix I was in, and I was dreadfully wrong. No one helped. Like Avo, they didn't even answer their damned phones. I was relying on others to help me, just as I had relied on others to fix my medical problems, which is how it all started in the 1st place for me. I learned to not really rely on anyone after all of this, which can present its own problems, but those problems are usually happy ones that aren't remotely dangerous to myself. I'm free. Free of just about everything that used to cause me fear or dread.

I forgot to answer your question Clara, "where did you go to, Avo?".

I played it by ear actually. After rehab I found a therapist that was not a two-hatter (I asked this first), that was trained in treating ptsd, but that also worked with clients that had drug problems. This is actually hard to do because most don't carry those too traits, unless they support 12-step.

It was in my belief imperative that I get help for my emotional problems. I wouldn't be able to stay clean unless I did this. I basically made a commitment of not using 'no matter what' and also work out my problems. I found a different psychiatrist and explored meds. I also concentrated on eating right and participating in activities that made me feel good. I saw my therapist 3 times a week and did a ton of trauma work. I'm really luck to have good insurance. It must suck for those that don't. People that don't have insurance generally don't have money to pay for counseling either. This and the med change was the foundation.

I've made bad investments too Clara. It's no fun getting "snookered", being wrong, or making a dumb choice. I think Perse is right though, despite being the one that has to take on the burden of loss, you don't also have to always take full responsibility. I think that as long as you take an honest look, and not lie to yourself, there will be times when there are multiple parties involved in the outcome.

I was being rhetorical - I had "cured" myself of the disease of addiction by finally admitting to myself that I didn't even have one. I actually always questioned this and never thought of myself as diseased, despite being told that I was and only staying in denial. I did believe that I was sick for life though, and also in some of the other false "symptoms". I was about half brainwashed, I think. I never fully accepted all of it. It was actually a great relief letting myself explore my feelings and beliefs. I did part of this on my own and part with the help of a private counselor. I had a huge feeling of relief. Kind of like freedom. There is a saying, I think in NA, that goes, (paraphrase), “Most of us were relieved to find out we had a real disease”. I didn’t feel that way at all.

Hmmmm. Thankful that I was pushed into the rehab? No, I'm not. I wish that I wasn't pushed and that my family and doctor allowed and supported my taking a different path. One that I had suggested and actually ended up doing. However, there were things that I learned in the last rehab that was beneficial. It also gave me some structure. I was on leave from work and sitting around all day would have been difficult.