Lost my job for leaving AA...

BlackandTan's picture
Submitted by BlackandTan on Mon, 04/23/2012 - 11:37

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I joined AA in 2007 after being arrested. I also got a job just a few weeks after being arrested. When I interviewed for the job, I was very transparent about my past, being arrested, and joining AA. I did get the job and all was fine until a few years later when I realized what a messed up, religious, mind-controlling cult all 12 step programs are. So I left AA. I was not quiet about it either. I had been spouting AA slogans and other nonsense for a few years, so I wanted to make it clear to people close to me that I am not a part of that anymore. I sat down with my boss and explained my position. Again, everything was fine for a while.
Then, about a year ago, in 2011, by former boss started sleeping with a woman who is a 25 year Al-Anon member. (I say "sleeping with" and not dating because my former boss is married, but not living with, his wife, engaged and living with his "fiance," and sleeping with the Al-Anon member.) After a few months, he hired the Al-Anon member to be his "accountant."
During her first week he intentionally started a conversation between the cultist and myself about our views of 12 step programs. So obviously his accountant and I never got along. After a few months the cultist convinced my former boss that he "needed a program." So they started going to Al-Anon and NA meetings together (at the time they were smoking a lot of pot together). It was during this time that I went from being a good employee in my bosses eyes to the world's worst employee. Everything I did was wrong. And somehow, his new f*** buddy/accountant/stepper nut-case became my boss. I had previously been the assistant manager, 2nd only to the boss. I was now just a regular employee who reported to the stepper idiot/accountant.
Around Christmas 2011 my hours were cut because he could not afford to pay the hours he had been (his words, not mine). I was unhappy about my hours being cut because my wife and I had just had a baby, she was 4 months old at the time and had had some extra medical bills and required special (expensive) food, so a loss of income was a scary thing. My hours were cut from 35-40 per week down to less than 15 per week.
My former boss lectured me that I just need to "let go and let god," "take things one day at a time," and "accept" that I am "powerless" over this situation. Over the next few weeks he, and his f*** buddy cult member employee, would constantly parrot AA slogans to me trying to teach me something. I guess I missed out on what they were trying to teach me.
Then, less than a month later, mid January of 2012, he sat me down to talk to me again. He told me that I had not sufficiently worked on my "acceptance" of my hours being cut. He also said that he was tired of dealing with my "antisocial" behavior. He went on to define "antisocial" behavior as: not bringing my daughter in to work to meet him and other coworkers, not giving pictures of my daughter to him and other coworkers, not "sharing" with him what I am "struggling with" and "working on," and trying to keep my personal life "secret." He told me that the only way I could keep my job was to bring my innocent little girl in to meet him, his f*** buddy accountant, and other coworkers (one of the other coworkers is an Al-Anon member, too), to bring in pictures of my daughter so they could keep them, and "stop being so private." He went on to explain that he has recently learned (I would assume in his cult meetings) that me not talking about my private life probably means I am hiding something and that I really need to talk to someone about what is going on in my life. I, of course, recognized this heavily loaded cult speak and told him that there is nothing "going on" with me and that I don't need to talk to my boss/coworkers about my personal life. He then accused me of "being in denial," and fired me. Then, within a week of firing me he hired 3 new employees (2 are steppers and the 3rd is a female whom he wants to sleep with) to work for him. Now remember, my hours were cut due to the fact that he could not afford the payroll he had been paying. But now, he has 3 new employees. Good thing these stepper retards are practicing "rigorous honesty" huh?

This all really upset me at first, but now, after a few months and starting a new job, I am actually glad that it happened. I now work for people who, as far as I know, are not members of 12 step cults...and even if they are, they keep it to themselves. This jackass that I used to work for has even tried calling me a few times, and asked to come over to my house to "see how you are doing." (BTW, I politely declined and have not heard from him since.) He has told mutual friends, former clients, and even prospective employers that I am "not in recovery anymore" and that I am "drinking again." (Those of you who have read my previous posts, the latter is true. I do drink. After leaving AA and staying dry for a year I started drinking again. My family is supportive and I do so responsibly. Drinking or not drinking is 100% a choice. The disease of alcoholism is a total myth. So whether I drink or not is absolutely irrelavant to him, former clients, or potential employers.) For him to paint the picture of me as a raving drunk lunatic is way out of bounds...but I guess I should expect nothing less from a brainwashed 12 step idiot.

causeandeffect's picture

causeandeffect

Mon, 04/23/2012 - 12:29

Wow. Just wow. What a horrible sense of entitlement these people have to meddle in every single aspect of your private life! And to suggest that you are "antisocial" just because you aren't sharing every single aspect of your life is incredible. It's just another reason to never, ever let anyone at work know that you ever had any issues with drinking, and more importantly, that you ever went to AA, especially when it comes to your professional life. It really can come back to bite you in the ass either way. Either they will be those who aren't cult members but have a friend or relative who is and may think you are a nutter for criticizing such a "wonderful, altruistic program", or they will be the cult members who will "go to any length" to drive you back to rock bottom. Or there's the chance that they have personal experience with an AA nutter, see it for what it is, and may think you too are a nutter for ever having been involved in the cult. It's a losing scenario any way you look at it. What you do at home, is your business as long as it doesn't interfere with your work performance and only a stepper would have the audacity to suggest otherwise. They have officially broken all healthy boundaries and expect everyone else to do the same.

I'm just glad to know you've found a job away from those meddling, privacy invading, creepy, space invaders. Good for you.

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Persephone In Exile's picture

Persephone In Exile

Mon, 04/23/2012 - 12:37

Amazing, these damned people. Glad you got away from them....twice.

http://badrecovery.blogspot.com/

JR Harris's picture

JR Harris

Mon, 04/23/2012 - 14:31

I'm getting to the point where I won't let any AA member into my home, introduce them to any of my friends or tell them anything about me. They are definitely dangerous to your health and well being. Once they catch you, they are merciless and try to tell people they are doing it to "help" you.

"Tradition 10 - Alcoholics Anonymous has no opinion on outside issues; hence the AA name ought never be drawn into public controversy." Please follow orders from the Interchurch Center if you are an AA member and don't comment.

Ironic's picture

Ironic

Mon, 04/23/2012 - 15:00

BlackandTan, good to see you, and I'm sorry to hear this story. As Orange would say, "more grist for the mill."

Thank you for the daily reminder to stay away from these people.

causeandeffect's picture

causeandeffect

Mon, 04/23/2012 - 15:09

Oh? I thought that was marietta's purpose for living. Well, that and scaring small children at the grocery store.

Troll free AA critical forum
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"The good thing about science is that it's true whether or not you believe in it." ~ Neil deGrasse Tyson

Pennywise's picture

Pennywise

Mon, 04/23/2012 - 15:35

The Steppers would say it is all part of God's plan. Pennywise says it sounds like your boss has a creepy obsession with your daughter. It's probably a great thing you no longer work there.

"Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid."

massive's picture

massive

Mon, 04/23/2012 - 19:10

Black & Tan- So sorry to hear this BullS####T. Steppers have an unbelieveable amount of entitlement. It makes me so sick. Im glad you have moved on. Im sure you will be happier now that you are not around them > hollywood is filled with them!

www.leavingaa.com is a site I created when I left last spring. Feel free to write your story there on the thread WHY I LEFT.

It s Bullshit program filled with many phonies. Its there way or the highway!

Massive

alkieanon's picture

alkieanon

Mon, 04/23/2012 - 22:04

You lost your job because your former boss was a j@ck@ss.

mfc66uk

Tue, 04/24/2012 - 00:54

Sounds like getting away from that lot is a good thing in the long run. I met so many people in the rooms who thought they were doing good by controlling others because they worked their stupid little programme. They were often unhealthy and I find that being around all those depressed and disturbed characters had a negative effect on me. It is much better to mix with normal people and emulate how they deal with life that a bunch of drama queen sickos praying away to higher powers who keep themselves in the past. Good luck with the new job.

Orange's picture

Orange

Tue, 04/24/2012 - 15:57

Thanks for the story. I feel like I just watched an episode of "Grimm".

becket's picture

becket

Wed, 04/25/2012 - 01:05

The boss was a jerk. Not your problem anymore. You're out.

Curious: did you sign some sort of agreement when you took that job that stipulated your home life and private time were property of the boss?

“The essence of the independent mind lies not in what it thinks, but in how it thinks.”
― Christopher Hitchens, Letters to a Young Contrarian

BlackandTan's picture

BlackandTan

Wed, 04/25/2012 - 18:07

but that did not seem to matter. It was a small company and the jackass boss made up all the rules as he went. When he was firing me, I said "I didn't realize sharing my personal life was a job requirement." He replied, very matter-of-factly, with "well it is."
It has been months since this conversation and I still cannot believe he said that...then I remember that he is a stepper and you never know what kind of nonsense may come out of their mouths.

"Jesus Christ! If that's a big book he must be a fucking giant! Run! Save yourselves! Run!"
Cheers!

patti

Fri, 04/27/2012 - 20:47

wow, is right. they are major creeps & the delusional sense of entitlement & the delusional self righteousness, they are always right in their minds & they are relentless about you agreeing!!! they know how you feel, you don\'t, they are creepy. they are complete & utter piece\'s of shit. and knowing them is bad, real bad, they are scary, creepy crawly stalkers, too. a childhood friend of mine that I lost touch with, had gone & quit years ago, we were in a market together & a woman from AA, he hadn\'t seen her in 15 years, started berating him & us in the dairy section, first of course she spoke of herself, & spoke of her self & spoke of her self, & her recovery, then she blasted him for leaving AA over 15 years ago & she insisted he was drinking!!! it was crazy, i wish i had seen this before I joined! i think it is common for cult members to emulate the leader, to become one & the same with the leader (without the perks a leader gets of course, like an AA Cadillac) to take on the persona of the leader, these creeps develop & evolve into Wilson, they develop a narcistic personality disorder. That is a behavioral mental illness, not organic like depression or schizophrenia. It develops usually by the time one is 15 to 16, people who stay in AA, are stunted back into childhood, back into a social arena comparable to junior high school & they develop this personality disorder, they become one with Wilson!!! The sense of entitlement, the lack of empathy or compassion, the self righteousness, all of it, they & Wilson one & the same!

patti

becket's picture

becket

Fri, 04/27/2012 - 21:12

WOW is right, patti. Haven\'t read such a line of stereotyping, pigeonholing drivel in some time. Your very own post reeks of the \"lack of empathy [and] compassion\" you paste onto everyone who\'s ever been in a 12-step meeting.

Great job, doll. Blinkered living reigns.

“The essence of the independent mind lies not in what it thinks, but in how it thinks.”
― Christopher Hitchens, Letters to a Young Contrarian

patti

Sat, 04/28/2012 - 21:28

Beckett,
let go & let God, lol.

Why read it?

Why not do something else with yourself? Your so angry, have you not rocketed into the 14 dimension yet? Your serenity, joy, enjoying life, happy to be an alcohol addict, because it\'s such a privilege, so special to be in AA, so special to live the AA way. I would think you would be letting go & letting God, instead of sweating & sweating & sweating what me or any one else writes, thinks or feels here. Why do you feel so threatened by us, why are you attacking people? shouldn\'t you be taking your own inventory & keeping your side of the street clean? You have a lot of preaches you need to practice, AA busy, well you are sort a busy, not like us that did not hand our will over to God & have God choosing us as so special & chosen among all of humanity that God is powering & running your life for you. You powerless folks do have more free time than the rest of humanity that has to be empowered & run their own life\'s, God only does this for alcohol addicts who are powerless. Us folks that are empowered have stuff to do that you AA folks, don\'t have to do, like think, think, use our minds, have a mind, think critically, think, think, think. You do have a lot of free time, no thinking going on, the big book & the 12 & 12 tell u what to do! No wonder you have so much time to boil over so often & be so outraged, indignant & angry about what I think & feel. You are so silly!

patti