On being a Dry Drunk

Once a person leaves AA they are of course a "dry drunk"

What is a "dry drunk"? Funny you should ask. Let's see what Buddy T has to say about it.

Buddy T says:
"Unfortunately when many former drinkers go through the grieving process over the loss of their old friend, the bottle, some never get past the anger stage."
Read more here >>http://alcoholism.about.com/cs/info/a/aa081397.htm

Buddy T knows what he is talking about. After all, he is a card carrying member of Al-Anon.

Buddy T MUST know what he is talking about. After all, he holds a BS degree in Psychology.
See Buddy T's "qualifications" here>>http://alcoholism.about.com/bio/Buddy-T-37.htm

*****************************************************

About Buddy
Buddy T. is in recovery from the experience of living with an alcoholic. Because he is a member of a support group that stresses the importance of anonymity at the public level, he does not use his photograph or his real name on the web site.

Experience:
Buddy has been in recovery since July, 1989 and has been the Alcoholism Guide since February, 1997. Despite years of research and experience, he's still asking questions and discovering surprising answers concerning this cunning, baffling, and powerful disease called alcoholism.

Education:
Buddy has a Bachelor of Science degree in Psychology.
*****************************************************

Who dreams this crap up?

Comments

alkieanon's picture

"Spiritual Malady"
Page 64

alkieanon's picture

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=alcohole
Is it better to be a "dry drunk" than an "alcohole"?

Persephone In Exile's picture

Ooooh, love the 3rd definition. What's more grandiose, exactly, someone who just stops on their own, or those who condemn people who stop on their own for not having done it their way?

Can this term be banned?

btnben's picture

I would have thought that was the least of his problems...lol. Those close together eyes need a bit of work...lol

God damn it, get me a whiskey

Bill W, Deathbed

http://www.youtube.com/watch?source=patrick.net&v=Sdn3O6aaMNc

Clara's picture

If you can do it, fine. If we all could have done it that way, that would be great, too. I put down the drink three weeks before my first meeting, so you could essentially say that I DID do it by myself. But staying stopped... I don't think it would have happened without support. I found it in AA.

Remember Christopher Stevens when you vote.

That's why americans voted for him in part, because he seemed like a nice guy to go have a beer with.
Pathetic.

Articles of Criminals In Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous
www.nadaytona.org

That's why americans voted for him in part, because he seemed like a nice guy to go have a beer with.
Pathetic.

Articles of Criminals In Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous
www.nadaytona.org

btnben's picture

..... George Bush was living proof that Indians fucked buffalo, but I would never repeat it. I'm sure it's untrue...lol

God damn it, get me a whiskey

Bill W, Deathbed

http://www.youtube.com/watch?source=patrick.net&v=Sdn3O6aaMNc

Clara's picture

That's funny. He was a very handsome man what he was young.

Remember Christopher Stevens when you vote.

Clara's picture

Yet the guy we have in there now invites people over for beers.

Remember Christopher Stevens when you vote.

This has got to be the most irritating of all the terms to come out of the recovery world. What it basically says is that when you quit your addiction and if then you are not happy, serence, peaceful...etc. then you are a dry drunk. Buddy T there says it's because the drinker who quits is grieving the loss of the alcohol and gets stuck in the anger phase. How does Buddy T know what the person is grieving or why the person is angry? I honestly feel that this term is strickly to get people to adhere to the program. Another cult tool and it is abusive especially when someone is angry about something else and the steppers tell this person they are a dry drunk.

Persephone In Exile's picture

Yeah, this one really, really bothered me for quite some time. It is very abusive, and I would NEVER sit quietly while seeing it used on someone who is vulnerable. I'm finally at a point, though, where if someone in "the program" were to use it on me (and by the program, I do also mean alanon/naranon) I think I'd end up laughing in their faces. Which may sound mean, but honestly, it's a good point to be at when these things make you laugh when they happen IRL.

becket's picture

Ah, but if you're laughing, the the laugh in genuine, then you don't qualify as a dry drunk, do you?

“The essence of the independent mind lies not in what it thinks, but in how it thinks.”
― Christopher Hitchens, Letters to a Young Contrarian

Clara's picture

I'm not so sure about that. I know people that have been in the fellowship for years that were as nasty as they ever could have been drunk. Some people don't choose to do the work it can take for change. And that observation is in both AA and SMART, so it might just be real. As Ben said, a thug is a thug. I say you can change that if you want to.

Remember Christopher Stevens when you vote.

Clara's picture

I think a better definition comes from the AA glossary - a dry drunk is a condition of returning to one's old alcoholic thinking and behavior without actually having taken a drink.

Remember Christopher Stevens when you vote.

alkieanon's picture

Source? Would be interesting to read the entire AA glossary.

Is there any other type of "thinking and behavior without actually having taken a drink"? For instance, another group of people, teetotalers.

It's just a negative judgement on someone's behavior. People have the right to be angry, rude, upset and nasty. If I don't like their behavior or attitude I can walk away. Anyone who has stopped addictive drinking and/or drugging deserves the right to NOT be called a drunk.

Clara's picture

Of course people are human and will fall prey to the usual emotions. But dry drunks are different than people with occasional fits of emotion. They are people that whose emotions are out of synch with what would be rational reactions. The Big Book tells us that elimination of our drinking is but a beginning. We work to change our responses and reactions, and some of that comes from working the steps. I think it's the same in most recovery programs. You can phrase it any way you like, action, change, points, steps...

Sure, YOU can walk away from their behavior... but they haven't or are reverting and the point is to move away from old behavior.

Remember Christopher Stevens when you vote.

becket's picture

"Once a person leaves AA they are of course a 'dry drunk'"

How did this ridiculous notion come into play? Did the nouvelle AAers make this up?

“The essence of the independent mind lies not in what it thinks, but in how it thinks.”
― Christopher Hitchens, Letters to a Young Contrarian